When they heard that their son, Peter, was an Aids virus carrier, his parents felt annoyed. ‘We didn’t think it was our turn for another problem. But now we just want to let people know the positive things we feel about it’, says Norman, his father, a 36-year-old computer systems manager.

Eighteen months ago Peter, a haemophiliac, developed antibodies to the virus after receiving contaminated blood-clotting agent. He was then nine, and it was the first case of its kind in Britain. ‘But we are level-headed, and haemophiliacs and their families are used to dealing with problems’, says Norman.

To the family’s disappointment, the local haemophilia centre did not know what to do. ‘They didn’t seem surprised that it had happened, but said that there was nothing to worry about’, says Peter’s mother, Doree. Aids is not a notifiable disease, but because of the risks ofblood spillage the parents decided to inform Peter’s primary school: ‘We wanted them to take precautions in case Peter injured himself in the playground. ‘

The result was that many of the parents, fearful for their children, boycotted the school – and a quarter of the pupils were kept away. ‘I thought they were going to come and daub our house with a red cross,’ says Doreen. The couple were particularly worried that the disturbance would escalate and that Peter would be taken away from school. ‘Being haemophiliac, he can’t ever do manual labour. He desperately needs his education’, Norman explains.

However, after two public meetings and a talk at the school by an Aids expert, the outcry died down. Classes were back to normal after three weeks. Indeed, Doreen and Norman were impressed with the support they received. ‘The only time I got really depressed was when our dentist refused to continue treating any of us’, Doreen says. ‘But Peter’s friends went out of their way to play with him and invite ‘im round to tea. ‘ In addition, they felt the school eased a lot of the pressure during the trouble, installing a special assistant to allay parents’ fears and keep a watch on Peter.

Norman’s complaint is that, despite an impression to the contrary, there is no counselling and back-up system available to families of carriers. ‘It just doesn’t exist. We haven’t been offered anything unless we have gone out of our way to ask for it. ‘ ‘In a way, it was fortunate that the problem happened to us’, Doreen adds. ‘Peter was young, so it was not the emotional shock it would have been for somebody older. And because of his haemophilia, he has aways had to face up to the problem of being difficult. It could have happened to a less confident family. ‘ Both parents have been tested for Aids and been found antibody negative. It is reassuring to think that you can live in such close contact with someone without being contaminated. As far as Peter is concerned, he is bored with all the fuss. ‘

Their son’s predicament has had little effect on their day-to-day lives. They still kiss and cuddle him, and simply observe normal hygiene precautions. ‘We keep an eye on any health problems – but you would do that with any child. We are mindful of blood spillage and take extra care when injecting him, to avoid jabbing ourselves,’ Doreen explains. The only time she was scared was when Peter developed what she thought were the first signs of the virus swollen glands. It turned out to be mumps.

They have yet to face the greatest problems. They are worried, for instance, about his next school. ‘Parents will be involved who haven’t been before. But we have gone through the battle for his education, and that has laid the cornerstone for the next struggle’, Norman says. ‘Then there is the problem of girls,’ Doreen says. ‘I can envisage irate parents turning up on my doorstep when Peter gets to the stage of trying to kiss girls. And what will happen when he wants to marry and have children? All we can do is give him the information and support and ensure that he is honest. ‘

Always in their mind is the possibility that Peter might develop the full-blown Aids syndrome. ‘It makes me sick when people bang on about divine retribution, homosexuals and promiscuity’, Doreen says. ‘I think – what about a 10-year-old haemophiliac? If he develops the syndrome, we’ll cope. You can’t just crumble into a heap. ‘ (c) Times Newspapers Ltd, 1986